REVIEWING THE NEWS BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE IS: Syfy is airing an original movie next summer called Jersey Shore Shark Attack. Which could also just be wishful thinking. It's about the blah blah that happens to the blah blah and stars dudes and Jersey Shore's Vinny Guadagino and Joey Fatone and Paulie Walnuts. Blahhhhhhh.
By Kenny Herzog
Say "blahhhhhhhhhhh." (Credit: Syfy/Blah)
A few things about the above production image from SyFy's upcoming original movie, Jersey Shore Shark Attack: That guy on the bottom right looks like E from Entourage (aka Kevin Connolly), and it's weirding me out man! Also, the premise of Shark Attack loses some bite when its characters appear in no way exaggerated from the real thing. Lastly, that title seems like it's missing a colon, which is something the flick might actually have in common with JWOWW and Snooki.
That's what she said.
What's Jersey Shore Shark Attack about you ask? Really? You do? OK, well, breed Piranha 3D with reality stars, Joey Fatone, a few guys from The Sopranos and Goodfellas, low enough filming costs to afford the aforementioned ringers and cast out blunt stereotypes as bait for profit, headlines and, oh yeah, sharks.
IN OTHER WORDS: This is the one instance in which it's not passe to suggest that a franchise has jumped the shark.
JERSERY SHORE SHARK ATTACK RATING: Oy/10
IS THERE NO SANCTITY AMONG SOPRANOS RATING? It's a Living/10
REMEMBER THE SITCOM IT'S A LIVING? LOVED THAT ONE RATING: 10/10
BLAH RATING: Blahhhhhhhhhhh/10
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